I am going to pass on a story that Tony Blauer shared with us during the seminar, I'm sure he won't mind. It is a story that every time I run it through my head becomes more powerful in the message it gives about mindset.
A young woman, about 27, took one of his two day intensive situational training courses. About six months later she was walking home alone at night in Montreal. She heard a man walking behind her, so she crossed the street, he crossed the street, she walked faster, he walked faster, she began to jog, he began to run.
She spun around to face him. He slashed her across the chest with a knife and said "that's just to show you I'm not F*&king around, do what I say." He then grabbed her and pushed her into an alley.
(First of all, he has told her something important. If the knife was only for intimidation, then he would not have used it right away. By using it, he had told her that he liked using it, and that there was a high probability that he would do so again. -- Tony Blauer)
In the alley he knocked her to the ground, pounded her in the face, got on top of her and began the to pull open her clothes for the sexual assault.
So there she is beaten, cut, totally victimized, and then she started hearing some of the things that Tony talked about in the seminar. And she said to herself:
"I'm going to let him rape me, but when he makes a mistake I'm going to take him out."
An amazing thing happened. The moment she said that he turned his head and closed his eyes. A mistake, he had taken his eyes off her. She drove her fingers up across his eyes then raked down across his face, and then smashed her elbow up into his face. He fell off to the side of her, she leaped to her feet kicked him in the head, then ribs and then head again, and she ran off to safety.
The cops haven't got him yet but there is a serial rapist/murderer in Montreal that cuts, then rapes, and then murders. Two women dead and one in a coma. She was lucky to be alive.
I'm going to finish Tony's story and then go back to why I feel this is such a powerful message about mindset.
Tony met this lady and her mother later on, and the woman introduced him as "the man who saved her life." It was very emotional and tears all around, but he kept telling her that he had nothing to do with it. She said yes he did, it was like he had been talking in her head. But Tony persisted that he had not been there, he had not forced her to come to his seminar. She had done it all herself. He did not stop until she believed him. He did it so that if, God forbid, she is ever attacked again she doesn't wait for his voice in her head, that she knows SHE can save herself.
So why does this story, of all the stories about real life he had that night, mean so much to me?
Review her situation. She is cut, beaten and pinned by an experienced rapist/murderer who is much bigger than her. Completely under his control, completely his victim. Yet in her mind she says "I'm going to let him rape me, but when he makes a mistake I'm going to take him out"
Think about. In what sense of the real world did she have any say in the matter? "I'll let him rape me." He was raping her with out her permission! She had no control in the real world whatsoever.
SO SHE TOOK CONTROL IN HER MIND!
She decided that he had nothing to do with it. She was in control. Her mindset was I'm in charge, I'm in control and when "HE MAKES A MISTAKE I'M GOING TO TAKE HIM OUT." So who had become the predator?
And then the magic, as soon as she said "when he makes a mistake" he does. As Tony explained to her there was no magic. There is a part of us that watches for what we want to find. You're thinking of buying a particular car, and all of a sudden you see all kinds of them everywhere you go. Did they just suddenly appear? No, a part of you was now looking for them. Tony said the guy probably made a number of mistakes but her mind just wasn't looking for them. The moment she told it too, it found what she was looking for, and because she was now the person in charge of the situation (the predator), she was able to take advantage of it.
The woman did not save her life by learning to strike up to the eyes, rake back down and then strike up with an elbow. Yes, that is the tool she used, but it was her mindset that saved her life.
I really appreciated Tony sharing that story. Think about it.