COFFEE BAR SHOWDOWN

Sensei Canna offers insight into the real world of self defense!

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COFFEE BAR SHOWDOWN

Postby Joe Madonna » Sat May 22, 1999 12:59 am

Van

To the coffe bar incident . You throw
your coat over his head and make sure
he never forgets that day!!!

Thats what yuor thinking but not going
to do. Unless he makes the first move.
I read somewhere before, that if your
confident in your abillites, its easier
to walk away. Instead of proving something to youself.

To the nipple thing .
If he believes in god he better start
PRAYING ....


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COFFEE BAR SHOWDOWN

Postby Van Canna » Sun May 23, 1999 4:26 am

Here is the response from my Anonymous friend :

"
........
Van Sensei,

I appreciate all of the comments my incident generated. I have kept out
of the picture to avoid "Monday Morning Quarterbacking."

Rick gave the most negative response. I do not believe I was at all
aggressive or attempting to "pick a fight." If I did, I would have swore
at him or tried to create a public scene, pushed him, or otherwise backed
him into the corner. My concern, and the reason I sent my first e-mail to
you, was how to avoid two extreme circumstances.

One the one hand, I agree that the situation did not at all merit violence
or aggressive behavior on my part. Certainly, had he started something,
or if the situation were as some described involving loved ones, that
would be a different matter entirely. I did and do not want to turn
someone's bad day into an even worse one for us both.

However, the guys behaved as a complete butt-head. Should I reward this
behavior? Will he not continue it? Is that my business?

One the other hand, as above, I think to slink away only perpetuates a
victim mentality, does not reinforce adequate conflict resolution, and may
even provoke the guy to escalate against me or the next person he meets
when he has a "bad day."

Though I think these questions are important because of personal
relevance, these are, in my mind, the type of conflicts most of us will
encounter. Frankly, the more extreme situations--you and your girl are
about to be gang raped and you or she carries a gun--have a certain
answer. These lesser conflicts--people "cut in" front of you, your
girl/boy/not sure responds to some denizen and gets you in the thick of
things, someone stops you in the parking lot because of some great sin you
committed on him in the road earlier--these ones we all run into.

Thank you for your thoughts and everyone's comments


------------------
Van Canna
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