I was reading a thread in another forum and I began to think about my own characteristics when I begin to get frustrated.
In this current time of declining stock prices and mass layoffs of employees, Van started a topic to warn us to be aware of the potential dangers of terminated co-workers seeking revenge upon their ex co-workers.
Van said <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote
One suggested way to deal with this is to not overreact to what they may say, not to ridicule them, not to destroy their dignity in any way, and to let them talk until they simmer down.
He also goes on to say <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote
But when they offer violence to you, don’t make the mistake of downplaying the event, or their capabilities, and don’t get lulled into a sense of light response/only needed. Those are the people who will hasten your funeral.
If the situation where an ex employee was to confront you, there would be no possible VSD that would deter his ulterior motive for being there in the first place. I would definately be leary of trying to talk some sense into this individual.
Then there is a post by Mr. Darrow where he states that a co-worker of his has fits of rage when things go wrong.
From Mr. Darrows post:
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>The disconnected rep went back into the systems room, and to all reports, yanked out the offending phone, threw it across the computer room and engaged in a several minute long fit of profanity, ranting and yelling...
After another incident of his slamming his fist into a desk so hard that it scared our office manager after a printer damaged a printout for him, I believe that I am right to be a little concerned. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
I believe that these two incidents, the ex co-worker, and the current co-worker are not what Van had in mind when he devised that topic.
I think about my own frustration when I have worked very hard for hours on a spreadsheet with many rows and columns of data only to have my computer lock up before I can save it. I have slammed my fist down upon my computer table many times when this has happened.
Once, while in my office, I was on the phone discussing a very touchy subject with my wife when she hung up on me. I was so mad I threw the headset over my shoulder and it struck the picture of my daughter that I had on my desk breaking the glass.
I have been accused many times by my wife of being a psychopath when I ham having a bad day and something goes wrong. She thinks that I may someday lose it and become a killer. I do not agree. I have been worse and I am getting better but I would never hurt anybody by venting.
What does it take to set me off, The list is large: The riding lawnmower blows a head gasket (has blown 4 head gaskets in 2 years); Explorer not responding message (My computer in work locks up at least once a week); Idiots who do not use their turn signals (Oh hell, Idiots who drive cars); Rechargable razor dies half way through shaving (PS there is no cord to plug it in and I have no bladed razors) after I haven't shaved for two days; Baseball Players in the MSBL who think that they play for the MLB; People who hurt children; People who hate Americans. I could go on but I need to get to the point of this topic.
I have never vented my anger upon another living thing. Not a cat, dog, fish or even house plant has been the object of my frustration. Oh yes, a few doors and wall panels have learned their lesson to not be in my vacinity while I was venting. My daughters picture, the phone, my desk, the computer table, the wastebasket has all seen either a flying appendage thrust upon it or another object is flung its way.
A few co-workers have also seen and heard this display of wrath which I cannot control some times. Some had the courage to confront this rage and see that I was not a maniac after all. Everyone loses it once in awhile and some of us more than others.
I have got better since I began my martial arts training. Most of the time I can go to the dojo to vent on the heavy bag.
My advice to Mr. Darrow, about his co-worker, and any of my co-workers who happen to be in listening range... Do not treat this guy as though he were a mentally deranged individual capable of shooting up the entire office. People who usually vent their frustrations in this manner are mostly harmless and only cause damage to objects and themselves. Speaking to them about the situation and reasurring that it is only a minor, or sometimes a major, inconvenience is all that is necessary.
The individual that I worry about is the one who never vents their anger or frustrations no matter what happens to them, even getting laid off and fired. People such as this who let it all build up inside and do not outwardly show any anger can be a time bomb waiting to go off.
I believe that this latter individual is the person that Van is warning us about.
No VSD can help when this type of person makes up their mind to vent their anger.
You must be prepared to act.
[This message has been edited by LenTesta (edited November 09, 2001).]