Alternative Medicine

Share your best jokes. (I'll have to make Susan the moderator of this one!)

Alternative Medicine

Postby NEB » Tue Nov 14, 2006 11:55 pm

A man awoke one morning with some "discomfort" in his penis. Alerted and concerned, he dropped his drawers and inspected his junk in the bathroom mirror. He grabbed onto a nearby towel rack to keep from toppling over when he saw it: His unit was horribly discolored and somewhat misshapen!

Later, in the E.R., the doctor delivered some grim and troubling news. Apparrently, while on an expidition in the Amazon jungle, he contracted a rare parasite and it invaded his manhood. As there was no cure that wouldn't also kill the man himself, his penis would have to be amputated.

Reeling from the shock, the man insisted on a second opinion.
"No problem", said the doc, "I'll put you in touch with the specialist."

The following week, the man underwent a battery of tests, including CAT scans, an MRI, a positron scan and ultrasound. The physician ran blood and other fluid tests and finally rendered his opinion. "Its gotta come off, sir. And I would recomment that you not wait too long....I'm concerned with that swelling"

"Oh God Oh God." The man lamented to his close friend. "What am I going to do without it? I won't even be a man. What will my wife think?"

"Calm down, man." His friend advised. "Don't listen to those damn doctors, man! They're always trying to cut things off of us, man. Here, take this number. Its my accupuncturist, Dr. Lee. He's the BEST."

"Thanks, I'll do anything at this point", said the man. He called the number and made an appointment for the next morning.

"I see, I see", said the venerable healer after inspecting the poor man. "Your friend right, western doctor always try to do expensive surgery." The man's heart lit up, at last a glimmer of hope! "Dr. Lee not greedy man, no need to amputate penis, just do nothing and in one week, penis fall off by itself! "
"Well, let's get to the rat killing..."
User avatar
NEB
 
Posts: 334
Joined: Fri Feb 15, 2002 6:01 am
Location: Los Angeles,CA USA

Postby Bruise* Lee » Wed Nov 15, 2006 10:38 pm

Well not so alternative, but medicine genitalia oriented - a man had lower abdominal pain. His doctor was unsure of what was wrong after all the exams and said exploratory surgery was necessary. After the surgery the man awoke and through his blurry vision saw the concerned doctor standing at the foot of the bed. "Doc, how did it go" said the man. The doctor replied "I have good news and bad news" "Gimme the good news first doc, because I feel terrible" groaned the man. "The good news is that we were able to save your testicles"....... "Oh that is great doc".... "the bad news is that they are in a little jar under your pillow".
Bruise* Lee
 
Posts: 345
Joined: Mon Oct 04, 2004 7:45 pm


Return to Laugh a little..Live longer!

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest