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RA Miller
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Post by RA Miller »

Something to look at. I've mentioned Toby Beck in a number of posts. Here is a link to an essay written under her SCA persona's name.
http://www.peak.org/~grainne/Ironrose/lizard.html
david
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Post by david »

Rory,

Great link. Bookmarked for future reference.

I stick sparred yesterday with a woman who has been training with me for almost two years. We used light rattan sticks and I have some deep bruises on my arms and another on my leg and back. We stopped finally when my stick literally broke in trying to block one of her power strikes.

So, what's the big deal? The big deal is that this was a person who used to just stop and cry when I hit her lightly in the face in empty hand drills. This happened on more than several occaisons. I watched the evolution. Watched her learn to brush off the inconsequential hits. Later she would drop on some of the bigger hits; cried her tears and got up and went at it again. I saw her when she first timidly enter into the sparring ring, fearful of hitting or getting hit. I saw the change over time and, more importantly, over hard practices. Yesterday, the sticks were flying. She had her moments of fear/uncertainly. Truthfully, so did I. The sticks hurt but we have to train to overcome fear as much as the pain.

I don't profess to know how to train women, or men, for that matter. I have had more guys guys drop out of my workout group than stay. I don't work with nor want to work with large groups. I realize that gender differences are at work and I try to be a little more supportive and slower in introducing hitting and taking hits with women. Nevertheless, I train with the intention of facing my fears by pushing myself to the edge every so often. When I hear about classes/seminars/training opportunities that give me a "funny feeling" in the pit of my stomach, I know I need to go there. That is where the edge between light and darkness is likely to be found. I expect the same of those who train in this group with me. There are no other benefits except for the opportunity to go into dark places of one's self and become comfortable with it.

I appreciate Toby Beck's perspective and will take into consideration the "hurdles." We can be supportive as we train and coach women, but each has to decide to jump those hurdles, to trip and fall, and to then get up and try again.

david
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