How many laws have you broken today?

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How many laws have you broken today?

Postby gmattson » Thu Dec 21, 2000 12:52 pm

STATE LAWS
a.. At a wake, mourners may eat no more than three sandwiches.
b.. Snoring is prohibited unless all bedroom windows are closed and securely locked.
c.. An old ordinance declares goatees illegal unless you first pay a special license fee for the privilege of wearing one in public.
d.. Taxi drivers are prohibited from making love in the front seat of their taxi during their shifts.
e.. All men must carry a rifle to church on Sunday. (Repealed)
f.. Hunting on Sundays is prohibited.
g.. It is illegal to go to bed without first having a full bath.
h.. A woman can not be on top in sexual activities.
i.. It is illegal to reproach Jesus Christ or the holy ghost. (MGL Chapter 272 section 36)
j.. It's illegal to keep a mule on the second floor of a building not in a city unless there are 2 exits. (MGL Chapter 272 section 86)
k.. It's illegal to sell fewer than 24 ducklings at a time before May 1, or to sell rabbits, chicks, or ducklings that have been painted a different color. (MGL Chapter 272 Section 80D)
l.. It's illegal to allow someone to use stilts while working on the construction of a building. (MGL Chapter 149 Section 129B)
m.. It's illegal to drive Texan, Mexican, Cherokee, or Indian cattle on a public road. (MGL Chapter 129 Section 35)
n.. No gorilla is allowed in the back seat of any car.
o.. Tattooing and body piercing is illegal.
p.. Children may smoke, but they may not purchase cigarettes.
q.. Tomatoes may not be used in the production of clam chowder.
r.. Quakers and witches are banned.
s.. Bullets may not be used as currency.
t.. Massachusetts liquor stores can only open on Sundays if they are in Berkshire, Essex, Franklin, Middlesex or Worcester counties and are within 10 miles of the Vermont or New Hampshire borders.
u.. Alcoholic drink specials are illegal.
v.. Affiliation with the Communist party is illegal.
w.. Public boxing matches are outlawed.
x.. It is unlawful to injure a football goal post, doing so is punishable by a $200 fine
y.. Defacing a milk carton is punishable by a $10 fine.
z.. It is illegal to frighten a pigeon.
CITY LAWS

Boston
a.. It is illegal to play the fiddle.
b.. Two people may not kiss in front of a church.
c.. No more than two baths may be taken within the confines of the city.
d.. Anyone may let their sheep and cows graze in the public gardens/commons at any time except Sundays.
e.. It is illegal to eat peanuts in church.
f.. An old law prohibits the taking of baths on Sunday.
g.. Duels to the death permitted on the common on Sundays provided that the
Governor is present.
h.. Women may not wear heels over 3 inches in length while on the common.
i.. No one may take a bath without a prescription.
j.. It is illegal for any citizen to own more than three dogs. Burlington
a.. You may not walk around with a "drink". Cambridge


a.. It is illegal to shake carpets in the street, or to throw orange peels on the sidewalk (section 12.16.100).
b.. It costs $50 extra for a permit for hurling, soccer or Gaelic football games in a public park on a Sunday. (section 12.20.030)

Hingham
a.. You may not have colored lights on your house if it can be seen from Main Street. Only white lights may be visible.
b.. If you live on Main Street and want to paint your house, the colors must be approved by the historical society.

Hopkinton
a.. Though horses and cows are allowed on the common, dogs are prohibited.

Longmeadow
a.. It is illegal for two men to carry a bathtub across the town green.

Marlboro
a.. It is illegal to buy, sell or possess a squirt gun.
b.. Silly string is illegal in the city limits.
c.. One may not detonate a nuclear device in the city.
d.. It is illegal for any citizen to own more than two dogs.

Milford
a.. Peeping in the windows of automobiles is forbidden.

Newton
a.. All families must be given a hog from the town's mayor.

North Andover
a.. An ordinance prohibits the use of space guns.

Woburn
a.. In bars, it is actually illegal to "walk around" with a beer in your hand. (Repealed)

Thanks to Bill Bauknecht for submitting this
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How many laws have you broken today?

Postby Panther » Thu Dec 21, 2000 3:57 pm

Gee... The missus and I have broken at least 18-20... hmmmm... I think maybe more! Image

I won't say which ones! Image (Getting that gorilla out of the back seat was tough! Image )

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote
If you live on Main Street and want to paint your house, the colors must be approved by the historical society.


By sister does urban renewal/development. In one town where she worked (in the South), there was a similar ordinance. A man wanted to paint his house and went to the Histerical, ummmm, Historical Society and asked for permission (as required by law) to paint his house a certain color... Permission denied! The Historical Society gave him a booklet with all the approved paint colors that he could use and told him that he could only paint his house with those colors. (They ranged from black to white, from dark navy blue to light green, but all were "historical" colors.) Sooooo, last time I visit, my sister pulls out a copy of the picture the man sent to the Historical Commission. He painted his house every single color in the booklet, but not just that... he did it in a camo pattern! Image Even painted the color number out of the booklet on each splotch so they couldn't question it. They took him to court and the judge ruled that he had followed the letter of the law which only said what colors he could use, not how he had to use them! ROTFLMAO!

And you gotta wonder, if someone actually broke Marlboro's law against detonation of a nuclear device... do you think there'd be anyone around to press charges? Image



[This message has been edited by Panther (edited December 21, 2000).]
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How many laws have you broken today?

Postby student » Thu Dec 21, 2000 6:56 pm

Nine.

But I don't live in the jurisdiction, and Mr. & Mrs. Panther outnumber me....

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