Osama weighs in

[Bill Glasheen]

For some of you who are confused, Osama is here to set us all straight.

Who needs CNN? CBS? The New York Times? Fox? We've got Al-Jazeera!



Exerpts from his speech, broadcast today (October 29) - just in time to help us make up our minds on November 2nd.

You have to hand it to him - he knows how to throw a party, and he has an impeccable sense of timing. What a guy!

We decided to destroy towers in America. God knows that it had not occurred to our mind to attack the towers, but after our patience ran out and we saw the injustice and inflexibility of the American-Israeli alliance toward our people in Palestine and Lebanon, this came to my mind.

Oh, OK. Thanks. We were wondering, after all...

Your security is not in the hands of Kerry or Bush or al Qaeda. Your security is in your own hands.

Right you are, sir! How did you know?

If Bush says we hate freedom, let him tell us why we didn't attack Sweden, for example. It is known that those who hate freedom do not have dignified souls, like those of the 19 blessed ones.

Yea...those sweet guys. I hope they're enjoying their virgins - in hell. Give them our regards when you get there.

To the U.S. people, my talk is to you about the best way to avoid another disaster.

We'd love to listen, but ever since 9/11, we've had this hearing problem. Must have been the loud noise that ruptured our ear drums or something...

It never occurred to us that the commander-in-chief of the American armed forces would leave 50,000 of his citizens in the two towers to face these horrors alone.

Yea, I know. What a pi$$er. Who would have thunk that there would have been a bunch of people in there on a Tuesday morning?

It appeared to him (Bush) that a little girl's talk about her goat and its butting was more important than the planes and their butting of the skyscrapers. That gave us three times the required time to carry out the operations, thank God.

Yea, thank God!

Don't worry - Michael told us. He got your memo. He's another swell guy...

Toodles, Osama baby. Don't let that boss hat restrict the brain blood flow. We have some communicating to do, and we want your undivided attention.

Your friend,
Billy

[benzocaine]

Gee.. if we were only more like Sweeden

The sooner our special forces find this peice of cammel dung the better.

Though a bullet to his head is to good for him.

starve him to death??

[Kevin Mackie]

If Kerry was President, Osama would be in custody and would be threatening the US.

At least that's what his mouthpiece Marty (Taliban) Meehan said on the radio today. Not that he'd try harder or smarter, he WILL capture OBL.

If Kerry actually has a plan to capture him, wouldn't it behoove this great patriot to unselfishly share that plan with the present CIC so that he can be captured and we can all as a nation rest a little better at night?

I've search johnkerrey dot com high and low and couldn't find his plan to capture OBL

Does anyone know what it is?

Is it part of his other "plans"?

Does it involve alliances? (other than local tribal warlords who know the territory like the back of their hands because we don't want to outsource the effort, unless it's France who know the Afgan outback like the back of an Iraqi greenback)

Does it involve modernizing our military, (and stop his record of voting against every major weapons systen since he's been in the senate).?

Does it involve deploying everything in America's great arsenal , quote diplomacy, our intelligence system, our economic power, and the appeal of our values and ideas -(what, don't we have any BOMBS in our arsenal???)

Does it involve freeing us from dependence on foreign oil? (how 'bout we drill in Alaska? Build a wind farm in Nantucket sound? ooops!) BTW, how many bills has Kerry sponsored on giving back the 70's tax credits for energy savings initiatives? Oh, nevermind.

Does it involve protecting our borders? (without interfering in the personal liberties of illegal criminals who enter our country with impunity)

Gotta love a man with a plan!


Kevin

[MikeK]

In that ad Osama sounded just like Kerry. Think about it both John Kerry and Osama are about 6'4". Kerry has a big chin and Osama is sporting a big chin covering beard. Both drone on and on. Maybe JFK is playing a little Holloween joke on us before the election.



To the supporters of JFK, I am not saying that he is the real Osama or a terrorist.

[Bill Glasheen]

Have your fun, and try to be nice to each other.

But just remember - this guy is trying to influence an election. It happened in Spain not too long ago. I've been waiting to see what the man had in store for us. Many of us knew something was coming.

He's a smart man, but not that smart. He can't help himself.

He really is in love with himself. I thought it was just a summer thing.

- Helen Hunt in Twister

Anybody ever heard of the law of unintended consequences?

- Bill

[MikeK]

Heck Bill, I'm just glad old Osama finally stuck his head up out of whatever latrine he's been hiding in to remind everyone what happened 3 years ago. It always amazes me what short memories people can have.

[Bill Glasheen]

Amen!

[IJ]

Question: Is OBL a complete idiot? I don't think so. I mean, he masterminded the most devastating attack on the united states. So, he's not stupid. Evil, yes, fantatic, yes.

So: OBL appears to be trying to convince Americans to vote against Bush. Right? He's anti-Bush. Could he possibly believe that any American is going to take him at his word that Bush is evil and cast their vote for Kerry or a third party person? What would that get him? Would he then stop hating America? I'm guessing not because he started his plotting before Bush was president. Does he think Kerry's going to start issuing visas to Afghanis and Iraqis and Yemenis and Saudis without qualms so he can cause more damage?

I think we have to consider the possibility that OBL knows precisely how most Americans would react to his opinion of Bush and that he might enjoy having a controversial, evangelical, Crusade advocating president to spar with. He WANTS a holy war. Bush has obliged. Good publicity for him.

We have to consider that possibility along with:
--He thinks Kerry won't or can't fight
--He just hates Bush
--He actually wants Bush to lose
--Perhaps he's too disconnected from reality and his power to be doing anything but grabbing for attention

[benzocaine]

Ian.... Amen!

[Andrew Evans]

I hope the next time we see Osama that he is wearing an orange prison jumpsuit and placed in general population so that... (let's just say that a quick death would be too good for him.)

[Bill Glasheen]

Funny thing is...I am not the least bit intimidated by this man. About all he appears to be able to do is get airtime on Al-Jazeera. All bark and no bite. A caricature of a bad guy.



How can you possibly read his sociopathic language and not laugh?

Yes, he did some bad things. Yes, he deserves extreme measures. But like Saddam in a hole, he has been rendered a pathetic character hiding like a mole in his cave.

He's probably freezing his butt off. No more pootang for the Islamofacist rock star... He's a has-been, thrusting his face on TV in hopes of achieving that comeback that he'll never quite get.

But no...the most honorable status he gets these days is a guest appearace with Bert.



Once you're on Sesame Street, your acting career is over...

- Bill

[Valkenar]

It's interesting that Iran is in favor of Bush (http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/World/2004/ ... 84-ap.html) and Osama is in favor of Kerry?

Not that either of their opinions are something to put any credance on, but it's interesting to consider.

I find his speech reads like any propoganda, including that of Kerry or Bush, frankly. Osama's speech is noticably more disjointed and illogical, but it seems frighteningly similar to me. A series of lies and distortions laced with just enough facts to catch the attention of someone who might be sympathetic or otherwise susceptible.

Transcript of his Bin Laden's speech
(http://www.cnn.com/2004/WORLD/meast/10/ ... ranscript/)

Couple points on what people have said:

Kevin, Re: sharing Osama-catching plan. It would be kind of stupid to publicly anounce the plan, if there was one, because then obviously he would just evade it. More likely he doesn't have a plan that's really all that much different (our options are kind of limitted), or that he has told someone, privately, but the current administration isn't interested.

Re: sweden. I do think we go overboard saying that these terrorists hate freedom. They don't hate freedom, in general. They certainly hate some freedoms, that's for sure. Nobody's going to say that they're into religious, freedom, for example. It makes sense to call them enemies of freedom, that would make sense.

But there are plenty of people in this country that like to ban books, and support censorship of dirty words and naked people. Would you say those people "hate freedom" based on their desire to quell certain freedom? I wouldn't, because they certainly hate neither all forms of freedom, nor the abstract notion of freedom. Even though they may work against it in specific areas.

As a sidenote, it's odd that he would pick Sweden as an example of a superlatively free place. I would've thought Amsterdam. [/url]

[cxt]

Valkenar

You also have to look at his overall worldview.

In his world he was the prime mover on the collapse of the USSR.

In his mind he did it once--he can do it again.

He also wants any "traditional" Islamic nation to return the Islamic fold.

That would include Spain.

In OBL case--he may well hate the very concept of "freedom"--depending on two things.

A-How exactly freedom is defined.

B-How strict a reading of the Korean you wish to use.

[Bill Glasheen]

Justin

From today's WSJ...

********

In Russia, Japan and Iran, Mr. Bush has received barely veiled government support for his re-election campaign -- a breach of the usual diplomatic etiquette whereby governments don't comment on other countries' electoral choices. Meanwhile, Chinese, Indian and Mexican leaders are quietly hoping for a Bush win, too, as are Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi and Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon, officials and analysts say.

***

Some overseas Bush supporters are motivated primarily by trade concerns. Despite Mr. Bush's own protectionist measures, such as imposing steel tariffs and agriculture subsidies, many governments see Mr. Kerry as the greater threat to international trade owing to his campaign rhetoric on the need to protect American jobs and on outsourcing.

Take Mexico. Despite the visceral hostility that opinion polls show many Mexicans feel toward Mr. Bush, some business and government leaders south of the border would prefer another four years of the Texan. He is seen as an ally on Mexico's top two priorities: expanding economic integration with the U.S. through free trade and revising U.S. immigration policy.

Mr. Kerry's campaign promises to review existing U.S. free-trade accords frighten Mexico, which has seen its exports boom since 1994's North American Free Trade Agreement. Mr. Kerry also has raised eyebrows further south by pledging to renegotiate the recent Central American Free Trade Agreement -- now awaiting U.S. congressional approval -- in order to strengthen labor and environmental provisions.

In Japan, too, Mr. Kerry's stance on trade concerns business leaders, while his proposal to start bilateral talks with North Korea over its nuclear program has rung alarm bells. Japan is one of five nations -- with the U.S., China, Russia and South Korea -- jointly negotiating with North Korea about dismantling its nuclear program. Japanese Prime Minister Junichiro Koizumi created a stir last month when he told reporters, "I'm close to Bush, so I'd like him to do well." He later denied trying to interfere in the election.

A couple of weeks ago, Russian President Vladimir Putin made what amounted to a call for Mr. Bush's re-election. "I consider the activities of terrorists in Iraq are not as much aimed at coalition forces but more personally against President Bush," Mr. Putin said, asserting that such terrorists would grow stronger if they were to succeed in securing Mr. Bush's defeat.

Washington's focus on fighting terrorism has enabled Mr. Putin to redefine Russia's primarily separatist conflict in Chechnya as chiefly a terrorist issue, reducing attention to human-rights abuses committed by Russian troops.

The Kremlin also believes a Kerry administration would resurrect former President Bill Clinton's foreign-policy team, which pushed for the North Atlantic Treaty Organization's expansion into Eastern Europe and the 1999 bombing and defeat of Serbia -- considered by Russians a fellow Slav and Christian Orthodox country. "These people are genetically anti-Russian," says Vyacheslav Nikonov, director of the Polity think tank in Moscow.

The head of Iran's Supreme National Security Council, Hasan Rowhani, suggested Tehran, too, would prefer to see the Republicans retain the White House when he told Iranian television last week: "We haven't seen anything good from Democrats." He said that while the Clinton administration introduced sanctions against Iran, the Bush administration has yet to harm Iranian interests.

China, meanwhile, has enjoyed a surprisingly smooth relationship with the Bush White House. Washington's preoccupation with Iraq and need for Chinese help with North Korea have allowed Beijing to quietly build diplomatic clout to match its economic heft. Beijing also frets that Mr. Kerry could be tougher on China's trade surplus with the U.S.

China isn't totally happy with Mr. Bush, though.

*******

In India, many analysts in New Delhi say the government of Prime Minister Manmohan Singh would quietly embrace a Bush victory, as it could lead to closer military and security ties between the nations. In recent months, Washington lifted sanctions barring the sale of certain dual-use technologies to Indian firms that were blacklisted after India's 1998 nuclear tests. Arms sales from the U.S. to India have surged. Indian analysts fear a Kerry administration could renew the Clinton administration's pressure for India to sign the nuclear nonproliferation treaty.

Indian businessmen and officials also have been spooked by Mr. Kerry's public attacks on the outsourcing of services to foreign companies. India has earned roughly $3.6 billion through back-office and call-center work in the fiscal year that ended March 31. The consensus is that Mr. Bush would be less likely to try to legislate against outsourcing.

****

This is all in contrast to a lack of support from the usual suspects in Western Europe. But then they lost their Iraqi bribe money...

- Bill