Raging Mother Bear

A place to share ideas, concerns, questions, and thoughts about women and the martial arts.

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Mike Hurney
Posts: 244
Joined: Thu Oct 01, 1998 6:01 am
Location: Marblehead, MA USA
Contact:

Raging Mother Bear

Post by Mike Hurney »

Dudes, Sorry to grenade you and take off. I had to put an Asset Protection Seminar together for tonight and December 5. As you all know without work and $eminars, life slows down considerably. The old root of all evil. You folks are heavy hitters and fast paced I enjoy it! Thank you all for the warm words and encouragement.
As controversial & anachronistic (hi Robb) as it is I'll stick to Ant'ny-sans (thank you sir) interpretation of my posting. The Squeaky _Wheel_Gets_Da_Grease and also define idiot for you, from my dictionary.
id-i-ot (id'-i-at) n. a born fool. someone
who believes society will punish a Defendant by removing money from the Defendant to be awarded to the Plaintiff and it will make them whole again.
Rick Wilson, I've found there is very little actual compen$ation that goes to victims. Look at OJ! Even then, Does money make you feel better (rhetorical question)? I hope not.

Anthony, the "husband' thing. Lori's (Ms)(It seems we get formal when we go to attack mode.) reaction is similar to what mine would be on the 16 boy vs 12/14's. My first reaction is: "No money, I'm the merchant of Venice, "I'll take two please, that is, pounds of flesh, thank you very much!" Sometimes as couples we balance each other out. You're hot so maybe your spouse will cooly ponder with caution. No answer, no problem.
Ms. Loftus, why don't you show that 16 year old your photo at the head of the forum he'll haul a** and leave town. I suspect it represents how you first felt. It scares me. I wouldn't mess with you, outside the forum. Glad you're in Florida.
I think we don't give these little girls ages 12-14 enough credit. I'd like to talk to them in 5 years. I'll bet they chew this s***head up and spit him out and may not even remember (let alone carry it for 30 years) this horrible experience except for reference of the fact that most people are basically good but don't let someone get you into a compromising position in case they aren't.

Peace back at ya,
Mike
Lori
Posts: 865
Joined: Thu Sep 17, 1998 6:01 am

Raging Mother Bear

Post by Lori »

"Mike"

I use your first name so that you don't continue to assume I am in "attack" mode - I do not "attack" anyone in these forums - only request clarifications when I have trouble discerning what the person is really trying to say - no easy task given the imperfections of language - but we can try can't we?

I probably would have chosen to ignore this (and you) except that Allen Mouton says you are a good guy - so I'm reserving full wrath and trying not to take offense here.

I continue to be confused by your statements - and this back and forth - what seems to be jabs and sarcastic digs by you in answer to requests for clarification by myself and others - is departing from the focus of this thread - let's get this over with and return to the matter at hand - as you suggest on another thread - not to turn this into an "AA" meeting - let's try some clearer communication.

You offer your definition: <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>id-i-ot (id'-i-at) n. a born fool. someone who believes society will punish a Defendant by removing money from the Defendant to be awarded to the Plaintiff and it will make them whole again.
Rick Wilson, I've found there is very little actual compen$ation that goes to victims. Look at OJ! <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
Mike, I'm not too sure that many victims of abuse actually feel that money will ever compensate them for what they have lost in self-respect, innocence or loved ones, and most don't actually initiate the quest for "compen$ation". Not the ones I have met. Actually it is more the blood-sucking ambulance-chasing type lawyers that use the situation to exploit it to it's fullest financial potential - I don't think the term "idiot" works for them either - The objection here to your use of the term is the way you seem to add insult to injury for real victims. I'm NOT talking about false accustions here - just the real victims which we seem to at least agree have suffered real pain.

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote
Ms. Loftus, why don't you show that 16 year old your photo at the head of the forum he'll haul a** and leave town. I suspect it represents how you first felt. It scares me. I wouldn't mess with you, outside the forum. Glad you're in Florida.
"Mike" I think you really know that that would not be appropriate. The matter is being handled legally - and though we may rail against the injustices of our legal system that ends up protecting the guilty and exploiting the innocent - as responsible citizens who choose to live in this society we must work with the system we have created. I'll leave it to the media to splash his name and picture all over - I choose not to indulge in that type of yellow journalism.

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote
I think we don't give these little girls ages 12-14 enough credit. I'd like to talk to them in 5 years. I'll bet they chew this s***head up and spit him out and may not even remember (let alone carry it for 30 years) this horrible experience except for reference of the fact that most people are basically good but don't let someone get you into a compromising position in case they aren't.
Yea - the social stigma and the shame of the courtroom experience should be a walk in the park for them. I'm sure their parents are all completely understanding and don't blame them at all and are all offering unconditional love and support. I'm sure that the girls will probably all forget this episode - except for the ones that continue to seek out domineering males who take advantage of them because they think that is what they deserve - the ones who will continue the cycle of victimization by marrying an abusive sicko who will continue to abuse them - and then their children - who will in turn either seek out more abuse or abuse others themselves - the age of these girls is a volatile one - they are forumulating their sexual identity among many other tumultous transformations in their lives - where it might be nice to think that they can derive something positive from such an experience - it's not realistic - instead it's about damage control and where they can go from here. Would you be so glib if it was your daughter who was raped?

Let's clear this up and move on.
Lori

[This message has been edited by Lori (edited 11-24-98).]
Knight
Posts: 55
Joined: Thu Nov 19, 1998 6:01 am
Location: Portsmouth,NH,US

Raging Mother Bear

Post by Knight »

Foul! This discussion is veering off course. Lori, you have a flamer on your hands. Rule of thumb, as I understand de Becker's Gift of Fear: don't respond AT ALL, and he will eventually lose interest. Harder said than done, I admit. J.D. is a gentleman who loves to challenge, but his younger imitators are, perhaps, drinking too much.
Regards, Michael
Rick Wilson

Raging Mother Bear

Post by Rick Wilson »

What many victims of violence need is vindication. An assignment of guilt in court can fulfil that need. Nothing politically correct required, just knowledge of the subject.

Rick
Mike Hurney
Posts: 244
Joined: Thu Oct 01, 1998 6:01 am
Location: Marblehead, MA USA
Contact:

Raging Mother Bear

Post by Mike Hurney »

Lori, Sorry I let my Politically Correct Filters down. I feel your pain.
To clear this up I'll probably be glib at my own funeral but my daughter? Based on past experience I'd convert the glibness to action and foolishly be in trouble myself. How about you? Clear enough?
natalie lane
Posts: 61
Joined: Thu Sep 17, 1998 6:01 am
Location: dartmouth, ns canada

Raging Mother Bear

Post by natalie lane »

(I may be mixing threads here)

Mike-

Not that Lori needs any backup on this, but I do feel that since she is the moderator, it should be her decision what is posted on her forum, not yours or mine or anyone else’s. If someone is going to stop this from sounding like an AA column, I’m sure it will be her.

Sometimes it’s hard to get your point across in a diplomat way when writing on this forum. Nuances of humor are often missed, tones of voices cannot be detected, and neither can facial expressions. Honesty is important, but so are people’s feelings. Just as you were free to make your posts, some other people had some opinions and experiences to relate. I personally did not feel these threads were disintegrating and if I did, I could always discontinue reading.

I wish I could be as certain as you of the outcome of the assaults on these girls. Unfortunately, what Lori had to say is the more likely outcome. There are many people out there who do overcome abuse and hardship, and they are strong, but not everyone is, and does that make the ones who suffer longer less human or worthy? Is compassion a lost emotion?


Regards,

Natalie
JohnC
Posts: 202
Joined: Sun Sep 20, 1998 6:01 am
Location: Florida

Raging Mother Bear

Post by JohnC »

Anthony:

I really suggest that you reread Mike's posts - there is an element of zinging that goes way beyond innocent or even cool irreverent humor, laid back attitudes or expected defenseness.

His tone is mocking. "I feel your pain". This is nothing but a smug put down.

His comments are taunting. " How about you". A gratuitous slam that not so subtly questions the heart of the moderator. Come on man!

His comments " I wouldn't mess with you -outside of the forum" - break out De Becker! This is both unsolicited promises and subtle intimidation.

His closing comments " Peace back at ya " reeks of more than a quant colloquialism!

Wake up and smell the coffee baby!


JohnC
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