Women's courage and vision

[Lori]

By Akeela Rasheed-Majid

My utilitarian lifestyle and attitude are the outcome of the lessons learned in my life. The events were never important and therefore not recounted. I recapitulate the lessons and the challenges they presented.

I was born in the 1950s in an Islamic home in India. In a culture where it is faithfully passed down from one generation of women to the next: "He is your father. Listen to him, he knows what's best for you." Where mothers teach their daughters, "He is your husband. It is your duty to obey him." Where it is "normal" for husbands and their family to abuse wives physically and verbally. Where it is "normal" for women to walk behind their husbands and keep silent.

In the 1970s I arrived in North America, well grounded in women's emancipation and the feminist movement. I came with dreams and aspirations of freedom to live, work and enjoy many possibilities. However, I soon discovered that a woman had no individuality, she was "honey" for all. A woman was paid less than her male co-worker doing the same work. Her indignation was blamed on "hormones." Soon I learned nothing is changed for women in the New World.

I recall a story told many years ago by a patient when I was working at a hospital:

When she was small, her father gave her a glass jar and told her to put fleas in it. She went to the family dogs and found enough fleas to make a good showing. At first the fleas jumped so high that they hit the lid and fell back down. After a while, however, they learned how high they could jump without banging their little heads. When some time had gone by, her father told her to take the lid off and see what happened. When she removed the lid, the fleas remained in the jar and continued to jump only to the level below where the lid had been - the level they had grown accustomed to. Her father said, "Never be like those fleas!" At the end of the story we shared a moment of knowing silence. I thought to myself, "My gender is my enemy"

In the 1990s I made a trip to Mecca for hajj (pilgrimage). In the short time I was there I learned women were segregated and kept indoors. Women were not allowed to step out alone or drive. Women were prohibited from working alongside men. Women had to cover from head to toe in long robes, showing only their eyes. I learned the rights given to women by the Creator were usurped.

Performing the pilgrim rituals I realized that men and women were actually reminiscing and commemorating the courage and faith of a woman - Hagar. Hagar was left in the middle of the desert to perish. She refused to wither and courageously took the challenge to survive. A well of sweet, life-giving water sprang up giving her life. She was transformed from bondwoman to an emblem of incredible faith, courage and perseverance.

I returned with a challenge and the nerve of Hagar.

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Well there is a month and a day for everything - last month was "Black History Month" - March is listed as "Woman's History Month" - so in the spirit of this forum - please feel free to add any stories of women's history that demonstrates courage or vision, or simply celebrates life.



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Lori
Forum Recommended/Reviewed Books

[Allen M.]

Well there is Sackagawea who is on the head of our new dollar coin. She heped Lewis and Clarke on their expedition through the wilderness. What a wonderful thought to put her on a dollar instead of using the bust of a president or of lady liberty.

[Gilbert MacIntyre]

The lesson I get from your story, Lori, is one I have known for some time. We are programmed from an early age and not many will grow to go against that programming, should it be wrong.

I teach my daughters how to debate, when there is something I take issue with I tell them "give it your best shot, sway me, tell me why I'm wrong" Sometimes they do, other times they just don't put up a rational argument, but they learn that they have the right to challenge authority in a polite manner.

I also teach them they are not better than any one else, but nobody is better than them. Our children shouldn't be weighted down with our biases, the greatest gift we can give them is freedom and intellect.

Anyone who hasn't read "Women Who Run With The Wolves" pick it up. It addresses this topic in depth.
Gilbert.

[Allen M.]

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote

please feel free to add any stories of women's history that demonstrates courage or vision, or simply celebrates life.

That's it? Two writers write something positive about women for women's month? And men writers, too?

Shame!

History is filled with outstanding women who have propelled humankind forward. Madam Curie comes to mind. Maybe she should drop a bomb on some cramped-up fingers to get the writing started.

I'm sure women must have heroes, their favorites.

Lori, this is not good. Help us out..



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Allen Moulton from Uechi-ryu Etcetera